A Day on Jupiter
No one has ever gone to Jupiter, except for me. I went there for a day, and it was quite exciting.
I went there by a rocket. When I arrived, I took a close look, the planet had swirling clouds. It felt like a Lilliputian landing on a basketball. I didn’t want to waste time, so I wanted to land on Jupiter.
While I was descending, I discovered that I could never land. It was a little disappointing, but I made the rocket hover over Jupiter.
I couldn’t just stay in the rocket for that day, so I put on my space suit and went out of the rocket. I even took a jar with me to collect gas samples.
While I was spacewalking, I met Marmalade, who was travelling around in his helicopter. He gave me a jar of helium sample and flew away.
When I returned to my rocket, there was a “low-fuel warning”. I quickly found Marmalade and told him I have no more fuel! Fortunately, he let me board his helicopter and flew me back to Earth.
It felt like a roller-coaster ride that day. I had landing problems and fuel problems. I should have prepared better to avoid these mistakes by doing research and calculations, but overall it was thrilling. If I have another chance to go to another planet, I would prepare better to minimize the chance of having technical errors.
Miss Lee’s Comments:
Love your story and how you carefully and intentionally use appropriate tenses, adjective and adverbs to enrich your story! Good job!